Waiting for the Night to Fall

For the life of me I cannot understand morning people. I am loathe to deal with anyone before 9 am, especially ones that are so damn chipper so early. I love working the midnight oil. For me, nighttime it is a time when I can just relax. I find evening comforting as the darkness starts to envelop me. The fogginess in my mind clears of any anxieties that were there before. Plans start forming in my mind for future projects, things I would like to do, and creative juices start flowing. I often get an adrenaline rush in the wee hours while the world is asleep. While they are sleeping I am working. No matter what, I always feel so guilty sleeping in the daytime and I find it very hard to do(so I just grab sleep where I can). I think it’s all due to conditioning. I was never allowed to nap during the day growing up, being called lazy when I wanted to do so. I was not lazy, never was, just nocturnal.

I read in Priscilla Presley’s very watered down and unjuicy Elvis and Me (don’t know what possessed me) that Elvis had a very different personality at night than he did during the day, a happier, more outgoing one. I had never, until that day realized me and Elvis had anything in common. That’s probably where the similarity ends. It’s just as well. BTW, kudos to Pricilla for staying beautiful for 67 years dispite the botched concrete fillers in her face, but back to my point. There are actually people just like me who live for the night time. My son is a perfect example. He is much happier and carefree when the sun goes down and his true personality emerges. To me that is a good thing – anything to lessen the teenage angst within has my vote.

The world has tried, and failed, to turn me into a day person. It is run by day people and left brained people. I don’t fit into either of those categories. I have missed so many job opportunities because I did not have the secretarial skills to pay the bills. Not to badmouth anyone with those qualities, but looking back, I would rather be the artistic nightowl I am anyday than fit into that boring mold. I never fit into that mold no matter how hard I tried or however much my mother wished it. But that is a whole other story and probably one best saved for the psychiatrist’s couch. Sufficeth to say, my nonability to pay the bills has led me to where I am today.

Often times I wished sleep was not necessary at all or that I could be like Margaret Thatcher and get by on 4 hours. Part of me agrees with Thomas Edison who thought sleep was a waste of time. Think of all the things that could be accomplished. I could get a 2 hour workout in, get a few paintings at least started, work on graphics, write several blogs, cook nutritional meals every night instead of the quesadillas that my teenager lives on, and spend that extra quality time with the kids that they are so deprived of  just because I am a workhorse. All I can do is make the best of the time I am not sleeping. I would be the first to admit I spend way too much time on facebook. To my credit, I stopped wasting time on Zynga games. To my discredit, I never should have tarted playing them in the first place. When it becomes work without pay instead of fun, I’m out.

I guess nature knows what it’s doing. Without sleep there would be no nocturnal show every night. Also, dreams often provides the fodder for an artist’s creative endeavors. Many a piece of artwork has come into existence just because dreams are so influential. I suppose There is a reason for every purpose under heaven. During sleep our minds are being repaired, the tiredness of our bodies melt away and become rejunvenated. The desires of our heart come to the forefront and God speaks.