Somebody Like You

A facebook friend of mine has been bemoaning the fact that he can’t find anyone and is tired of pursuing anything meaningful. This has given me inspiration for this blog. Whether you want to admit it or not, we have all been there. I’m almost 40 now, looking back on my 20′s, I think about the idiots that have come and gone. I know I really dodged some bullets. There were some I dated because I thought I couldn’t do any better. Girls, never stoop and shortchange yourself. I learned the hard way. When I was about 20, I dated a guy I should not have even considered. I was young and cute and shouldn’t have lowered my standards. He was short, fat and not a looker. He was also a bit on the obnoxious side, and did not even want to meet my parents, which was so embarrassing trying to explain to my parents. I think or at least hope he’s matured some. He was not a catch by any means. Needless to say I felt bad when he gave me the brush off. Lesson here: When you ask for the short end of the stick, that’s what you end up with. By the time he came crawling back I had moved on. I think he realized too late what he had lost. Too bad, so sad. I was in college, enjoying it, when I met a most dispicable person who will remain nameless. This was a turning point in my life and, when I decided never to let anyone try to dominate me. He followed me into Pizza Hut when I went to lunch with a friend, which he told me long after the fact. He repeatedly asked me out but I was not interested. He was the most persistent person I had ever met. I finally told him I was not attracted to him. He was half Asian and I liked white guys. So he told me I was racist once and then another time told me I must be gay because I did not find him attractive. You are attracted to what you are attracted to. There is no racism about it. Then, while I was at work, him and my downstairs neighbor got into a fight because the other guy had sent me flowers. They were both “off” anyways. So the neighbor tried to beat him over the head with a baseball bat after nameless guy tried some martial arts move. I would have actually paid to see that. He smothered me so badly. I couldn’t even sleep in my own bed without him right there. The final straw came on Halloween. The idiot was dressed up as a soldier and following from place to place. Finally I broke away and went home. Next thing I know he’s chasing me up the stairs of my apartment yelling. Luckily, I made it in and locked the door. He cursed out my 2 lesbian neighbors and called them “dikes” and they called the cops. I was very grateful. Then the idiot stick goes home and reapeatedly calls me so I just turned it off. That’s exactly when you know what you don’t want. Lesson learned here: Scrape em off.  Miraculously, I moved on from him unharmed, at least physically. Those are just 2 examples of  some bad realtionships I’ve had so the reader can glean from it whatever he or she wants. So, never finding who I was looking for, I kept looking. I always felt like I was looking for somebody in particular and when I would meet someone new I would think to myself “It’s not you.” It seems like my whole life I have been searching for that one elusive person. I wasn’t sure if I was the only one that felt like that. I finally met my partner and he was such a breath of fresh air from what I had dated before. I have been with him for 11 years in November. He has been a godsend, such a great guy. I already had a son from another crappy relationship, so he took him to raise and everything fit into place. It isn’t every guy that will accept another man’s child. It takes a special man. He isn’t the most exciting guy, I admit, but that’s okay. I am flamboyant where he is definitely not. We work very well together even though we are polar opposites. I never felt like he was the exact person I was looking for but that’s okay too. I believe everything will be revealed in God’s time.