Heavy Hearts

With a very heavy heart today, I could not help but constantly think of those parents who’s children where the victims of senseless violence yesterday. I, as a parent, cannot begin to fathom what they must be going through, having to identify their children’s bodies. It’s a parent’s worst nightmare. We would all take the bullet for our kids, given the option. I know that we all go in the end, but, as a parent, it is my sole wish that I go first into the great hereafter from which we came. Unfortunately, it doesn’t always work that way. Yesterday, these little ones were brutally struck down before they even had a chance to live. They were here so briefly. One has to wonder why. I believe there is a reason for everything, though we may never understand until we get to our final destination. I am taking advantage of the time I do have with my kids because you never know what tomorrow will bring. I will be holding my babies tight tonight.

I made it a point today to hover over my children in every possible way, just happy to be around them. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t terrified to send them out into such an evil world. All I can do is ask God to protect them but I have to ask one thing every Christian and atheist alike is asking. Where was God when all this was going down yesterday? My only answer would be that he allowed it for some reason or another. There is knowledge that we are not privy to until the end comes and it is our turn, then we will have all the answers to every question we ever wanted to know. At least, that is what I believe.

In the Bible it say life is like a vapor. “For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away” (Jas. 4:14). This scripture talks about how the brevity of life compared to the one that awaits us. While my heart is broken over this massacre of innocents, I know without a doubt these children were chosen for a higher purpose and God is in charge. I think we all have our own missions in life and theirs was fulfilled that day. I know that doesn’t ease the burden of the parents. My prayers are really with them at this most difficult time. I can’t but feel very emotional as I write this.

I will try to take this time to grieve with the parents and the nation. I will appreciate what I have but I feel a bit guilty celebrating Christmas this year when these parents are heartbroken. It will be a more toned-down affair this year. I also feel guilty posting anything frivolous on Facebook. A few things made me laugh so I did it anyways but everyone is so sombre and it doesn’t feel right. My son’s favorite duo Smosh or whatever they are even decided to take a break from their regular rounds of BS. I do have to give it to them there. Everyone is still in shock. In all due respect, let’s learn from this and prevent it happening again.